To Link or Not to Link...that is the Question

At last, I have finally figured out how to link! Actually, my mom kinda showed me how, but still! From now on, you shall always see those cool little blog names instead of some weird stuff that was on previously. You may notice I changed Johnny’s blog name a little, but surely you agree it was for the better. I mean, am I the kind of person who would lie about a name? NO, I am not. Some of you may also be wondering why your blog is not listed with the others. Here is why. YOU GUYS HAVE BEEN IGNORING MY FABULOUS POSTS!!!!! Here I have to newish posts, and the only ones to comment have been Michelle, my mom, Megan, and Stephanie!!!! Come on people, what is so hard about writing a short encouraging message to myself? And so, in light of this, my rules for linking go as follows:
Family members in my immediate family automatically get a link, despite how often they comment. In a prolonged absence of commenting however, I may be compelled to alter the name slightly.
Outsiders only get the COVETED privilege of having a link on my blog, if they average at LEAST a comment on every other post that I post, for about six posts. In the absence of comments for more than three posts after receiving a link, I may be compelled to alter the name slightly.
Lastly, if I happen to be a frequent reader of a blog, and LOVE it to death, I might, as a figure of my gratitude, link that blog. None of the commenting rules from above would apply, but if the blog started going down the tubes, I may be compelled to alter the name slightly.

I hope that now that you all are aware of my linking/commenting issues, my average comment number will increase. As I write this, my average comment per post is six. With your corporation, I hope to raise this average in the next, say two months to eight over a one week span after each post. Don’t make me come commenting on my own posts just to raise the average, I need help. And your the one to help. Plus, u get a link to boot! TTFN!!!!!